Holidays can be lonely in the land of the single person. I remember the first holiday I ever spent alone. I was 21 and living in New York City for the summer (sidenote: ohmigosh, opportunities are wasted on the young). I grew up in a big family, meaning holidays were loud, really loud. So when 4th of July rolled around, it felt weird and downright wrong that I would be spending a holiday alone. I was already incredibly homesick that summer, so knowing that I would be all alone for the fourth did not help things. Looking back, I wish I had just scheduled some sort of activity instead of just moping around like the spoiled young adult I was.
Since then, I’ve spent a few other holidays alone. A couple of New Years while I was getting my MFA, a bunch of Valentines, an Easter or two, and definitely more than a handful of Halloweens (does Halloween count when you’re over the age of 18?). I’ve learned that planning a few activities to keep you busy and not spending too much time looking at all the fun the social media world is having helps the holidays I spend alone pass by without (many) tears. It also helps that I like myself a lot more in my 30s than I did in my 20s. Points for self-love!
Of course, in the age of social media and apps galore (Meetup for the win), spending a holiday completely alone would be my choice nowadays. And I kind of dig that! Buy yourself a Valentines goody, decorate your own dang eggs, and write a list of all your wishes for the New Year.
The guy who says he is getting back in the dating game has usually just gotten out of a pretty serious relationship. Which means, he isn’t afraid of commitment – or at least he wasn’t afraid. You’re going to have to do some digging early on because if he got too hurt, he may have trust issues. If he’s getting out of a relationship that lasted over a decade, he probably has no idea how to date a 30-something Goddess.
The Hookup Guy
This guy wants to hookup and only hookup. He is probably the kind of guy girls obsessed over when they were 20-somethings who didn’t know any better, but now he has to turn to Tinder for his ego boost. If you look at his profile and think that maybe you could change his mind eventually, well you can’t. If you really want to end your single days, then swipe left, FAST!
The Open Marriage Guy
I don’t really understand the whole concept of an open marriage, but I’ve also never been married. Honestly, this just seems like too much work for me.
The Guy You Kind of Know
It’s always awkward when you land on the profile of the guy you sat next to in US History in high school. Or your brother’s friend who you thought was happily married with two kids. And your ex-boyfriend? Well, that’s just plain depressing. Of course, if you are interested in this almost stranger or getting back with an ex, swipe right. Maybe the Tinder magic is all you needed.
The Nice Guy Who Will Ultimately FriendZone You
Okay, this one is probably way too personal. Two of my former Tinder flames eventually played the old “you’re a really good friend, but that’s all you are” card. Am I bitter? Oh, hell yes I am.